1. The final line of which 2004 film is, “Go get ’em, tiger”?
2. What is the world’s largest rodent: (a) capybara; (b) chinchilla; or (c) gerbil?
3. This year’s Australian F1 grand prix winner, Sebastian Vettel, drives for which team?
4. What colour is chlorine gas?
5. What is the world’s highest capital city?
6. All seven crew members died aboard which two space shuttle missions? (Bonus points for naming the years of each disaster.)
7. Home and Away
’s Summer Bay is actually filmed at which Sydney beach?
8. Who wrote the play Rosencrantz and Guildenstern Are Dead
9. The abbreviation CASA stands for which government agency…?
Civil Aviation Safety Authority.
10. Name the only woman nominated for this year’s Gold Logie.
“If you go down to the pub and talk to small-business people, they’re not talking about econometric models.”
The treasurer continues his relationship with voodoo economics, refusing to release modelling to support company tax cuts. He’s possibly right about people down the pub, but they also steal schooner glasses and are not, you know, running the country.
“I thought I would be disappointing them if they knew I was gay. So I never did anything.”
The singer confirms to fans that he is married to his long-time manager, Garry Kief. Next we’ll find out he’s tinting his hair.
“Regrettably, our attention to detail at that time wasn’t at a level it should have been.”
The chef apologises to staff for six years of miscalculated wages. The “detail” represents $2.6 million in unpaid labour.
“There are many instances of people who were homosexual who determine they are no longer gay.”
The Tasmanian senator gets the Barry Manilow news badly backwards. He also confirms he is a Kinsey Six when it comes to his political interests, which are now exclusively concerned with the persecution of gays.
“Thank goodness someone is speaking up at last for the bush, thank goodness someone is speaking up for Queensland. We haven’t had this since Joh.”
The elected conspiracy theorist remembers the good old days of wanton corruption, white suits, police brutality, gerrymander and bags of unexplained money, with a little racism and perjury for good measure.
“I wish to apply to fill this vacancy if I can be of service to Sky News.”
The Christian Democrat applies for Mark Latham’s old job. Among his credentials are producing a newspaper called Family World News for 25 years and being thoroughly out of touch with reality.